I'm resurrecting this blog from internet oblivion!
I have been on the pity pot more often than not just recently -- Just discouraged, frustrated, very tired of being limited and sick, weary and worn. The last three years, I have taken a turn for the worse in my illness journey, and it has taken it's toll not only physically, but emotionally, and even spiritually as well.
Usually, the warmer weather and sunshine of summer gives me more energy and I am able to do a bit better. This year, however, I have been really still struggling, and it has just really got me down.
God has been reminding me to be grateful. (I will probably share more of this in future posts.) Therefore, it's time to start this old blog back up again, so I can look for and record God's simple gifts to me even during this time of struggle.
Several months ago, I stumbled upon Mandy Meehan's vlog on youtube. Like me, she has CFS. Like me, she loves Jesus. And like me, she desires to serve Him even during this time in her life. (Fun side-track: a few months ago, David and I started attending a local church which ended up being an "open network" church -- using resources from Life.Church, including the video messages featuring Pastor Craig Groeschel. We really have learned so much from him and love his style of preaching and leading. We call him our "video pastor." A few weeks after we started going, Pastor Craig mentioned in one of his messages, that his daughter struggles with a mysterious chronic illness -- of course, my ears pricked. He then showed a picture of her...it was Mandy! I had no idea! But I don't think this is just a coincidence.)
So anyway, yesterday afternoon, I decided to catch up with her youtube videos. It had been a few months, so I guess you could say I had a "major Mandy marathon" binge-watching several of her vlogs. She's quite a bit younger than me, but her honest sharing what God has been teaching her through "this season" touched my heart and reminded me of several truths I had let slip away from me. Even her reference to "this season," was comforting, bringing to mind this is but a time, maybe not forever (even though her "season" has been much shorter than mine. 😉) But one vlog in particular, hit home. She was talking about Galatians 6:9: "Do not get weary in doing good..." and reminding me/herself that we can't get weary in doing whatever we are called to do, even doing what we need to get better. It's very easy for a person with chronic illness to become weary. Just getting out of bed does it some days. But I have become lazy and unmotivated to even do the things I *can* do to try and feel better, because I haven't seen any results. God really used this young woman to speak into my heart and get me back on track. So thankful! Here is a link to her youtube channel if you'd like to check her out: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCctsJOxJwHkc6aDkXOhWatg/videos
Moving forward, this blog is mostly just going to be a place for me to remember and record all the blessings...big and small... No pressure on myself. I will be ok with not finding the perfect font, perfect picture, perfect phrasing, the perfect pithy title, for the perfect blog post. I. will. be. ok. with. it. 😉 Some posts may just be a picture or two. Some may be a line or two. On occasion, there may be a longer one. We shall see. By recording them here, I will be remembering them, which will make gratitude more intentional. But also...if my meager words here can help someone else, then that would be an even bigger and better gift!
